Buddy Check returns to in-person meetings

Posted

For 14 challenging months, Nick Werman attempted to provide outreach to area veterans any way he could in the face of the COVID-19 pandemic.

Phone calls, text messages and check-ins through social media replaced in-person meetings associated with Seward's Buddy Check program, which was put on hold because of the pandemic and related health measures. Buddy Check is a statewide program, geared towards suicide prevention in veterans, that provides veterans a judgment-free place to gather with one another and chat.

“I had a list of about 30 people I called once a week to check in and see if everything was OK,” Werman said. “I did that for a solid year.”

Thankfully for Werman and the 30 to 40 veterans who have utilized the Buddy Check program in Seward, the group in April was able to meet in person for the first time since March of 2020. Nearly 25 people gathered at Bottle Rocket Brewery in Seward for the restart of the program on April 22.

The group now plans to meet once a month, always on the 22nd day, which pays respect and gives awareness to the fact that 22 veterans die by suicide every day. Werman said the significance of 22 reflects why the Buddy Check program was implemented and the importance for veterans to have a place to speak without any judgement.

“It's taboo to talk about suicide in society. One of the goals we make here is to take away that taboo and walk straight up to someone and ask them if they're OK, if they're thinking about suicide or hurting themselves and to be able to have that conversation without it being weird,” Werman said.

Seward County Veteran Services Officer Matt Starkey added that the term “buddy check” and the meaning behind the meetings is rooted in the military and is instilled from the first day of basic training.

“Day one in the military, basic training, you are always with all your buddies,” he said. “We use the phrase 'buddy check' to see if your buddy is squared away, if he's healthy. It goes all the way back to our training and comes forward here because of the number of suicides the military is having.”

Buddy Check meetings are informal in nature, with no agenda and no monthly topic. Guests are invited to stay as long as they like and speak to the group, to just one table or not even talk at all. Werman said the purpose of the meetings is to provide the opportunity for people to talk and not feel like they're pressured to share or have to follow traditional meeting rules.

“It's not set up as an organized meeting,” Werman said. “It's just everyone getting together and hanging out and it works.

“It's run by veterans, supported by veterans, for veterans.”

Werman said that although Buddy Check was designed for military veterans, it's open to anyone who works in a field that requires risk, danger and tragedy. First responders, law enforcement officers and anyone whose job has come with trauma are welcome to join gatherings as well.

“Anybody, veteran or not, that needs someone to talk to can come talk to someone,” he said. “Through their line of work, they see some of the things that we've gone through, and we want to make sure they're integrated and feel welcome as well.”

The next regular Buddy Check meeting will be May 22 at 7 p.m. at Bottle Rocket Brewery. The group also offers a weekly coffee on Wednesdays at 7:30 a.m. at Sparetime Lounge.